We Need a List, Not a Production Number

Recently, I was excited to receive Rescue Dawn on an MGM Blu-ray Disc. I had missed the film in theaters, and Werner Herzog is one of my favorite directors. But at one point, I thought I’d never get to see it.

After the disc loaded in the machine, I was presented with what seemed a simple menu. I clicked on the sound I wanted, DTS, but nothing seemed to happen. I went to Subtitles and started the movie, only to find Spanish subtitles at the bottom of the screen. Back to the Main menu. I finally figured it out: The options are listed in black; when you select one, it turns a maroon that’s very close to . . . black. When you move on, it turns bright red. Equally frustrating were the chapter menus, which showed only a postage-stamp-sized view for each scene, and no identifying title. From 12’ away, I could barely make these out.

All this was nothing compared with the menu for Disney’s Blu-ray edition of Cars. I really thought I’d be kept from seeing the film at all. I loaded the disc, and in a reasonably short time was rewarded not with a menu but with a series of five trailers. Clicking on Menu did nothing; I had to hit Chapter Skip five times, then Menu. At which point the machine went back to a "loading" screen, and loaded for well over a minute. I was then faced with a menu of two billboards, one each on the left and right of the screen, with a road sign in the middle. The road sign read Play -- no question as to what that meant. But the billboards read "Visit Radiator Springs" and "Tour Pixar Animation Studios" -- nothing like the usual Scenes or Setup or Extras. Not knowing what any of this meant, I had to experiment. I clicked Tour, and up came an image that looked like a bulletin board, full of pictures and various oddments. I finally found Set Up, in the lower right-hand corner, and clicking on it presented the options. I selected Audio, which gave me a choice of Dolby Digital 5.1 or Uncompressed PCM 5.1. I chose the latter and was taken back to Set Up -- there was no way to get back to the Main menu without first going through Set Up. These changes were slow and clunky -- and this was only to watch the movie. I shuddered to think what I might have to go through to watch any extras.

Not having the fortitude or desire to do that right away, I shifted my attention to the new HD DVD/DVD combo discs of the first season of Star Trek. Disc 1 loaded a lot faster than the Blu-ray had; so far, so good. The menu begins with an animation: you’re in an elevator going to the transporter room. Once you arrive, a box pops up on the left side of the screen, with blipping lights on both the main picture and the inset box. It’s all very confusing. The only familiar thing presented in the box is the title of the first episode, "The Man Trap." If you click on that, it doesn’t take you straight to the episode; instead, another bar appears that reads "Engage Episode." You click that, and then you go to the episode. But what if you want to set up the sound first? You have to press your remote’s Down button while you’re on "The Man Trap," which gives you a drop-down menu that says "Communications." Drop down from that and you finally get to Audio Selections. The set’s box lists three episodes for disc 1, but where were the others? I found, by experimentation, that if you click right on "The Man Trap" again, it slides left and brings up the title of the next episode.

These are extreme examples of unwieldy menus, but there are plenty of them, and not just on HD DVD and Blu-ray. Just about every other release I put in the player is hard to navigate in some way. It seems that producers have forgotten what a menu is supposed to do. Like a menu in a restaurant, it’s supposed to list options so that one can easily make a selection. But today’s menus have sweeping this, swooshing that, and blinking the other, often accompanied by repetitious, deafening music -- not to mention an introduction to the menu itself that takes another ten seconds or so. This might be cute the first time you play the disc, but grows more irritating with every subsequent viewing. In short, producers make the menu a show that detracts from the real show. Following are two examples of good menus.

First, Days of Heaven (Criterion): After the disc is loaded, the Main menu pops up -- no FBI warnings or trailers. A still from the film is displayed, and on the left are listed Play the Movie, Chapters, Commentary, Actors, and Camera. The last two aren’t crystal clear, but you can find out quickly, with no waiting, that Actors contains two cast interviews, and Camera lets you choose between interviews with two cinematographers. It’s easy to know which option you’ve selected from the Main menu: the selected item is underscored with a horizontal line that stretches almost completely across the screen. The chapter list is concise, and each chapter has a clearly printed title -- no hard-to-see postage stamps. You can return to the Main menu from any submenu.

Even more clear are the menus of A History of Violence (New Line). When the disc is loaded, it does automatically start to show trailers, but press your Menu button and, following a tiny introduction and some scenes from the film, the Main menu appears -- artistic but not unwieldy. At the bottom of the screen are the choices: Play Movie, Special Features, Set Up Options, Scene Selection, and DVD-Rom Online Features. Nothing could be clearer. Set Up lets you pick sound and subtitle options, then return to the Main menu or continue the movie. There’s no need to backtrack through other menus. Scene Selection brings up four live-action thumbnails per screen; and if you can’t see them from too far away, they’re also titled. Each choice is marked well; this is an ideal menu.

Most folks, when they insert the disc in the player, just want to see the movie or TV show or concert or opera. If you’ve been waiting a long time for a favorite title, you don’t want to wade through a sea of menus. A plea to the designers of DVD menus: Just let us know what the options are, in clear language and graphics, and make sure that we can access those options with as little effort possible. And while you’re at it, shift those obnoxious FBI warnings and trailers from the beginning to the end.

 ...Rad Bennett
radb@hometheatersound.com

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